Diary 2022 (115) August 19th – 21st We try to keep going

Friday, August 19th, I had another day seeking an aim for my second life. I was in world several times during the day. Once again I hopped over places. I saw a nice black outfit on a domme at club DeLust. It turned out to be a new relased outfit of XO, a favourite shop of Jenny and me. I got the new outfit, in particular as it fitted perfect for the theme that I had selected for our party at night:
It’s Friday again and we will continue having our party to start our weekend properly. Jenny loved shiny black clothes. So dress up in shiny black or come as you are (even naked). DJ Virgo is spinning the tunes.
You may want to stop by at Jenny’s memorial monument, it is right opposed to the house. Please leave a message – and include her into your prayers.
I had one play in public with another domme at club DeLust in the earlier afternoon. It was strange for me, yet I admit it was exciting nonetheless (no pictures here). When I returned in the later afternoon I went to club Domme a Domme and watched what was going on there with one eye (and there was entertainment). Again and again I get IMs even from people who I didn’t know, but who knew Jenny. She was respected by many.

When I returned at night to prepare for the party I had a nice surprise. Angelique moved back in at home. It is good to have her back and close to me, in particular these days. After a visit at Jenny’s memorial we went to club DeLust to kill some time and to watch people.

The party was very eomtional for me. Jenny loved our party. It was and still is the start of the weekend. Jenny loved it full – and it was full for her and for me, in who she will live on forever until I will see her on the other side. We had fun, we danced and we shared good memories. I was thankful for the support I experienced. It was good to keep up the traditional party. I enjoyed although I had some severe crying attacks.

August 19th – Friday night party: slave Holly, Diomita, Angelique, slave Alessi, Ebony Massey, Sarah Fhang, Baroness Capelo, Claven Albatros, Betina Sands, Dely (Krysbia), Liz Swann (lizswann), Perla S. Topaz (Perseo Topaz) (upper row), Della Randt, Starbright Wingtips, Bastet Starchild, Filipa (Filip Huntsman), Kawaii Suki, Jayson Dakota, Adumadan Biziou, Haly Shinn, Virgo Babii, Virgo Babii (lower row)

August 19th – Friday night party – a picture taken by slave Holly

Saturday I started into my day with confidence that I will feel my way out. I made some decisions and I was inworld several times that day. I even had two shorter plays as a sub. Both dommes were quite understanding (and “nice”) but somehow it felt so wrong. I know it is me who is not ready for it. I have to give it more time. My confidence shrank and I knelt at Jenny’s memorial again with crying attacks. Somehow even a virtual place for my grief in RL and SL provides some solace.
I met slave Holly and Angelique in the later afternoon and we talked a bit until I had to leave for dinner. I took slave Holly to the lamp outside ot the house and locked her there. She made a nice picture of herself.

At night I played a skipee with Angelique, Flo and slave Lily (Lily Bloodrose). slave Holly, slave Sakura (sakuramatsumoto) and slave Alessi came also inworld. We went to club DeLust that night. I literally had my hands full and I felt bad that I had not enough time to talk properly with all. I need to develop a strategy or plan to make enough time with all of them – and to have time for myself as well. My positive energy of the morning was gone. But I have to be thankful for what Jenny and I had together and that I am embedded in a loving family with many friends.

August 20th: slave Holly locked at the lamp at home / Diomita, Angelique, Flo, slave Alessi, slave Holly, slave Lily and slave Sakura at club DeLust

Sunday, I met with Kitty in the morning at Lochme and we hopped over a few empty places. In The Red Room we had fun watching a sub getting transformed into a ATM. Unfortunately we failed getting some money out.
slave Holly and I had planned to meet in the afternoon. I took her to club DeLust and we talked how we could find back the easiness we had before. I still know what which buttons I have to press and I used my knowledge. When I had her where I wanted her I took her to our (now mine) secret place and made her lick me. slave Holly and slave Alessi will get addicted to my sweet poison. I need that now.

August 21st: Diomita and Kitty at Lochme / Diomita and slave Holly at club DeLust and at the secret place (pictures by Holly)

At night I was early and I had a little roleplay at club DeLust. “Someone” grabbed my RLV, restricted me, tranquilized me and threatened me to become her sealed rubber object to be shown around:
Just imagine yourself totaly encased in rubber just a rubber anonymous thing. All 3 holes plugged and occupied, those pouty lips sucking a large rubber dildo gag so long and wide you’re kept silent unable to moan or make a noise, the other 2 holes plugged with shocking vibes always keeping you on edge and horny but never able to orgasm just melting your mind into being a horny rubber dolly, kept always totally encased with heavy restraints and strict restrictions, always showed off as a shiny rubber doll on a leash for the world to admire. I can coat the plugs for all 3 holes with ghost pepper sauce with all plugs filled with more sauce that they self lubricate with more sauce on timer.”
Jenny would have loved it! She always said that people in SL don’t dare using cuffs, keys and RLV as they did in the earlier years of SL. My “Someone” was not just evil. I explained that I am needed now and so she just teased me verbally – she was “An Individual” as I was restricted after being tranquilized by her. Most probably she will try again to capture me.
I returned home as I expected the family and spent some time at Jenny’s memorial, telling her about my little adventure – and had the first crying attack that day. It slowly becomes bearable. And it is good to speak with Jenny.

Flo, Angelique and slave Holly showed up and we played a skipee as teams. And Ebony came by and spread kisses everywhere.
After the game we went to Psi’s realm, where Alessi joined us, then to Carnal Intentions and finally, after Angelique and Flo had left for bed, I took slave Alessi and slave Holly to club DeLust where Argi joined us for a bit.

August 21st: Diomita at Psi’s realm, Carnal Intentions and at club Delust with Angelique, Flo, Argi, slave Holly and slave Alessi

For me Jenny seems to be everywhere, watching me … and smiling to me with a nod. And nonetheless I miss her so badly.