Writing about Goddess Yasmin Heartsdale is difficult. Where shall I begin? What shall I write that hasn’t been written already? I met her during my time at Pandora’s box. I worked as a Mistress there in February/March 2008. I have only little memories to this first meeting. I was busy trying to control a riot when she showed up and according to her memory, ‘I treated her very arrogantly’, at least badly enough for her to remember me and my name.
I was also often at Stonehaven. Stonehaven was at this time the meeting point for the English speaking bdsm community. I looked for a place to settle and found a home at Stonehaven. What a coincidence, my home was next to her home. Just a short fly away. That’s where we met again. The first time we played she locked me into a cage and stripped me. Then she exposed me to her subs and friends obviously proud of her catch. I felt bad and humiliated and I told her in IM. She released me still in a playful way. I assume that was the moment where my trust began. I searched her nearness. We had some nice conversations. Then she and her family moved to Mises West. A whole sim for her family. A huge house. Several Areas to play. I was impressed and felt honored being welcomed there. It must have been during my first or second visit. Yasmin gave me a tour and we were up at a hill. A magic moment in my memories. She took my keys and I knelt in front of her. And it was the first time that I called her Goddess. That felt strange for me those days as much as it would feel strange not to call her Goddess now. Goddess leashed me at her office. What I didn’t know was that this marked the begin of my trial.
I had a sub these days and I wasn’t sure how I should handle her but Goddess told me that would be no problem. I was moved several times during my trial. Most of it I spent in a tube cylinder cage at Goddess’ house in Stonehaven. The trial lasted over 3 weeks. I had another sister who was with me in trial but who was dismissed shortly after my collaring. My dear friend Tyra, who was sub of my sister to be Samatha, spent many hours at my cage. This was the base of our friendship that lasts today.
The weeks of my trial left a deep experience. I did something for myself. I submitted. I invested a lot of myself to become hers. And today I see this as the deeper sense behind a trial besides that you meet family and beside that you get the time to talk and to think and to adjust your position. Without having invested anything you’ll leave quicker. I see many people here with short relations who change their dominants and subs like others change their clothes. Having invested you’ll think twice, you’ll consider upsides and downsides.
Oh, wasn’t this entry about Goddess? It seems that my thoughts and my writing are distracted in between again and again. Goddess’ family grew quickly and I saw a lot of changes. Up until today only my sister Yar and myself are left over from these days. Goddess collared and released subs. To some she made the impression of being a collector and I heard a lot of critic. The family moved to Rivers Rock, a sim operated by my former sister Samatha. As Sam and Goddess parted we had the first sharp change in Goddess’ family. In her grief Goddess wanted to release all of us except her former wife Teyonas and Yar. I felt really bad. My SL world broke down. I didn’t understand what was going on. And even now I can only speculate what I won’t do here. But I remember that I begged Goddess to keep me as some other sisters did, some sisters left. I stayed with Goddess. We had several moves in the following weeks and months in the search of a new home. Goddess kept her core family together. During all these moves I stayed in Rivers Rock and Goddess allowed that although she herself did not visit Jenny and me there. For her RR was tabu for a long time.
Wasn’t I about to write something about Goddess? See, I have so many memories that I want to write down that I lose the subject again and again. But maybe all these episodes characterize Goddess.
Goddess is a very caring family head. When I needed her she was there for me. Her family is large and I could experience several attempts to treat us all equally, to distribute her limited time fair between us. And keeping in mind that we all live in different time zones around the world that is a hopeless task. We had “office hours” where she was in her home sim open to visit her and we had great hours together chitchatting. She tried to arrange fix appointments but too often was restricted to keep them herself or her brats couldn’t be there in time (as RL comes first it is sometimes hard to keep appointments). I know, that Goddess cares about each and everyone in her family. But nowadays she doesn’t try to be fair anymore. We know each other well enough and she cares about those who need her the most at that moment. And I think that’s the best way to share her.
Goddess can be very consequential and strict. When she’s upset, no one can really stop her. Then she insists of her position as our Goddess. You are for her or against her, you follow her or you leave. That was the case when she broke with Sam. She can rule harshly, although this happens on rare occasions, but I keep this in mind always. She can and she does rule.
Goddess is a kinky weired dominant. We all are weired and most of us a proud to be kinky. Her play likes reach from very sensitive loveplay over roleplay to hard and strict bondage. Goddess loves to see beautiful avatars and high quality realistic animations. She also has no reservation regarding science fiction, pony play, nekos, heavy rubber, fucking machines, dolls, unrealistic toys or endless arousal. She loves to restrict her subs and playmates totally by taking all their abilities, to make them depending her her. Until today, when Goddess locks me, she takes often everything – names, locations, inventory, tp … everything. Thus I am aware who owns me. And why? Because she can!
Goddess is spoiled and knows that she is. She’s spoiled by our love and our support of her. Yes she’s human, she certainly makes wrong decisions but there’s no difference between RL and SL in this relation. Our love and support is what she gets in return for her never ending care about her family.
Goddess is one base of my SL while my love Jenny being the other. Wearing her collar protects me. I built my own SL often similar to her, tried the same things, introduced similar rules for my subs. She allowed me doing that, she allowed me to grow, allowed independence and an own SL for me. I am proud to be hers and I hope that I can wear her collar many many years to come.
I love you Goddess